What I know so far?
1. We're stronger than we think we are. Often when shitty things happen, our initial reaction is to freak out, crumble for a moment and then find our way back to ourselves. I've lost a parent, a lover, a job and more. These are essential processes for life - I'm no self-help guru, but I honestly believe that difficult situations facilitate an expansion of sorts. You pull out some sort of drug-inducing strength, lean on the self-love and realise you're resilient as fcuk. It's not as easy as that - I know - but, in hindsight the TLDR is that we have the capacity for more than we think we can handle.
2. Cooking and playing around with ingredients is pretty much the only time that my anxiety is (nearly) non-existent. It’s strange how submerging yourself in a kitchen stocked with cheese, bread, wine, spices, fresh vegetables and pretty much every condiment under the sun can calm me down to a core. Find something you love that doesn’t involve your 9-5, click into still mode, absorb the energy of a self-indulgent hobby and just let go! Playing outside the lines can be oh-so-rewarding.
3. There will always be bad people with shitty intentions in the world. No matter how great you are as an individual, you can’t stop karma or some greater purpose from happening. It’s no indicator on your worthiness in this world, but it reminds us that not all people are created the same. Some of us find it easier to escape into the grime of these streets and that’s a bigger lesson for them in the end. My take? Never stop trusting, never stop learning from the bad and remember that everything - the cheating ex’s, the bad haircuts and that stranger you met at the bar - happens for a reason.
4. The subtle art of not giving a fuck is an actual thing. Don’t spend your time wondering if you offended someone by not inviting them to your cat’s birthday soiree or if they’re mad at you for choosing to stay in on a Friday night. Our time is precious AF and it’s yours to honour. As I’ve started ageing, I’ve slowly started to stop worrying about pleasing acquaintances or going to that party that I don’t actually care about. Friday night after a long week? Fcuk it, I’m hibernating with a glass of wine and The Crown on repeat. The Sunday before adulting kicks in? I’ve committed to spending every Sunday by myself with myself. It doesn’t mean that I’m not going to at the all-you-can-drink cocktail station the night before, but it gives me a bit more balance in the everyday madness.
5. Wash that makeup off, drink more water and don’t take your hips for granted. I’m ashamed to say that I used to go to bed plastered in overpriced facial layers and I’ve got the indentations to prove it. Your body is only as kind to you as you are to him/her/shim - look after it from the inside, nurture those bones and stretch!
6. If you feel that you're repeatedly going through the same shit, it's probably time to ask yourself "what's the lesson I'm meant to learn here"? There's something bigger hidden behind every bad breakup, wrong turn and haircut gone bad - and, it’s your personal responsibility to find the sparkle in all of it. Locate the emotion, learn the lesson and let it go.
7. Everyone needs to travel solo at least once before turning 30. Yes, I know that this one is on every damn chicken soup for the soul checklist, but it’s a legit game changer. You get to immerse yourself in the things that truly get you going, you’re forced to find comfort in your own company and the plus side is that you get to eat a pizza by yourself while people-watching from a sidewalk. Give me more.
8. Your mind really is your best/worst friend. I recently reminded myself that I'm solely responsible for my energy - we give out what we want to get back. Respect your inner thoughts and give it the chance to manifest into something that makes your light grow even bigger.
